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I’ll admit that I’m envious of USC football fans. It’s not because they have an undefeated team or a stadium practically on campus. And it’s definitely not because of Tommy the Trojan and the two fingers he raises whenever the band plays “Tribute to Troy.” (Whenever I see that, I just wonder, who’s number one?)

Still, Tommy does have one thing going for him that brings out an energetic, albeit obnoxious quality missing at UCLA home games. Beer.

It will probably be the most common beverage outside the Rose Bowl this Saturday and the most popular one for television viewers at home. But it’s sorely lacking where it is needed most. On the inside.

UCLA doesn’t sell beer at home games for the simple reason that it tends to incite unruly behavior among the fans. But we’re talking about a football game, not a microbiology lecture. The object of the sport is to pummel guys on the other team into the ground. The whole environment screams of rowdiness and it’s a shame that fans are left out of the mix.

Beer makes a lot of things more enjoyable. People and dancing are the first things that come to my mind, but sports is a close third. Fans should be given as many opportunities as possible to enjoy their experience at football games. Sure, the greatest satisfaction would come from watching a Bruin victory, but standards for a good time shouldn’t rest on that. With UCLA likely to be a heavy underdog against Tommy’s Trojans again this year, beer might at least provide a distraction from the scoreboard and playing field. Or at the very least make UCLA fans forget about the score quickly.

I remember attending the USC-UCLA game my sophomore year at the Rose Bowl. USC may have jumped out to a 21-0 first quarter lead, but I couldn’t help but think that the real winners were the UCLA fans still tailgating in the parking lot. While I was trapped stunned and sober, painfully watching endless Trojan touchdowns, the tailgaters could remain oblivious to the horror on the other side. By the time they merrily entered the Rose Bowl, they could enjoy UCLA’s second half charge.

I also remember taking a bus with my dorm floor freshman year to the rivalry game at the Coliseum. Although I wasn’t old enough to buy a beer, I felt comforted by the fact that any 21-year old Bruin could overlook the 27-0 shutout with one trip to the concession stand.

In fact, the person from our group who probably had the best experience that game was my neighbor across the hall who left her seat to use the bathroom and returned a while later with a free beer and some guy’s phone number. She may not have been a football fan, but at that point, most Bruins didn’t want to be.

For the most part, beer shouldn’t be used to help fans forget about the game they’re watching. Drinking to forget just makes you remember something even more unpleasant the next day. But having a beer at the Rose Bowl might simply help some fans unwind and relax or encourage others to cheer a little more spiritedly during an eight-clap.

I understand that security doesn’t want things getting out of hand at sporting events, but this preventive approach doesn’t necessarily stop the problems. Although UCLA prohibits alcohol consumption inside the gates, fans still have plenty of time to drink themselves silly before going in. If anything, they probably feel more compelled to down an extra beer or two beforehand, knowing they won’t have the opportunity to drink another one for a long while. Unless Rose Bowl security starts issuing Breathalyzer tests at the entry gates, there’s nothing to prevent an obnoxious drunk from causing a scene just minutes after entering.

There’s also very little to prevent fans from sneaking in a couple beers into the stadium if they really want to. Bulging six-packs (of beer) may be spotted by a security guard and purses carrying the extra baggage can be weeded out, but stray beers in baggy pockets can almost always slip through the cracks. Short of patting down all fans at the entry gates, I don’t anticipate the Rose Bowl ever being truly dry.

Clearly, there’s a lot of money to be made in concessions, and UCLA should take advantage of that fact by selling one of sport fans’ most popular items. Doing this probably won’t even cause an increase in unruly behavior. But that’s just because I’m assuming they would overcharge for the beer.

E-mail Finley at afinley@media.ucla.edu if you have ever snuck anything into the Rose Bowl.

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