Wednesday, December 3, 1997
... but A&E is heating things up. Sort of. Here are our holiday video rental recommendations.'Twas the week before finals and all across campus students were braving El Niño's icy torrents, ruining many a pair of shoes in Westwood Plaza's cruel puddles, leaving many a pair of shorts tragically unworn.
Winter break is almost upon us and the weather promises to be bad. You'll be stuck at home with "A Very Brady Christmas" the only light in your bleary life. And you're certainly not going to read. Whatever. You did that all quarter.
Enter your friendly A&E editors and staff writers. We're here to remind you that the Wherehouse is your friend (and Hollywood Video, and 20/20. The verdict is still out on Blockbuster). We didn't want a month without the Daily Bruin to rob you of our presence, so curl up with your VCR and know that A&E cares.
"Clueless"
Directed by Amy Heckerling,
Starring Alicia Silverstone, Brittany Murphy, Paul Rudd and Justin Walker
Ok, so the only reason guys may rent this one over the holidays is to refresh those dreams of all they want for Christmas and it sure ain't their two front teeth. Alicia "I'm-so-sexy-and-cute-and-pouty" Silverstone plays Cher, the spoiled little rich girl with a heart-o-gold who remakes her new outcast friend into an acceptable socialite in this chick flick. The garb in this teeny-bopper delight is so stylin' that any fashion conscious girlie-girl will run out to Contempo and charge up that plastic.
Don't fret, it's not just one giant Sea Breeze commercial (although it comes damn close). The film is complete with an exciting pseudo-car chase scene, a romance between two socially inept high school teachers orchestrated by Cher herself and a fabricated teen language that, cheesy as it is, cracks a smile. Everyone from "Betties" (good-looking girls) to "Barneys" (ugly guys) to "Cake Boys" (gay males) will laugh at this one.
"A Bronx Tale"
Directed by Robert De Niro
Starring Robert De Niro and Chaz Palminteri
Once upon a time, there was a little boy named Calogero, the son of a modest New York bus driver, Lorenzo Anello (Robert De Niro). And then there was Sonny, the perfect addition to any fairy tale the neighborhood mobster "godfather." Anello does all he can to keep his son away from Sonny's underground corruption, but sometimes trying just isn't enough.
Complete with big guns, tough men, and wars of blood and love, "A Bronx Tale" is a story for all (grown-up) girls and boys, perpetuating and satisfying that lovely stereotype: the need for romanticism in flicks to satisfy the female folk and testosterone-peaking action for the male folk.
"Eat Drink Man Woman"
Directed by Ang Lee
Starring Winston Chao, Sihung Lung, Kuei-Mei Yang and Chien-Lien Wu
If reading anything during winter break is just too strenuous of an academic task to handle, stay away from this foreign film. Unless knowing what the characters are saying isn't all that important but making taste buds water in the pre-holiday feasting spirit is your goal.
"Eat Drink Man Woman," in Chinese with English subtitles, details the tragicomic life of master Chef Chu and his three rebellious daughters. Through his intricately prepared Chinese delicacies, he tries to keep the family traditions and connections alive. But with the youngest daughter discovering her first love, the middle daughter jumping in the arms (and bed) of a married co-worker and the eldest finding her own sensuality, food just doesn't seem to cut it. Madness seems to have overtaken the Chu household and Chef Chu eventually becomes a part of it. Just watching this film will cause a late-night run away from the turkey and to the nearest Sam Woo.
"Sunset Blvd."
Directed by Billy Wilder
Starring Gloria Swanson and William Holden
It's hard to get much more noir than this classic tale of a kept man. The year is 1949 and William Holden is Joe Gillis, a struggling screenwriter about to give up on la la land. That is, until fate brings him to Norma Desmond, a star of the silent screen who doesn't understand why everyone's so hung up on dialogue these days. The setting is 10086 Sunset Blvd., a rambling, gothic, delightfully horrid mansion complete with a dead chimp and a spooky butler (Erich von Stroheim). Soon, Norma is paying for Joe's suits and planning her comeback as he "edits" her melodramatic screenplay.
All the ingredients that make "L.A. Confidential" and "The Big Sleep" hard-boiled icons are here in pumped- up form. We get the glamour, the moral rot, the cynical narrator fighting his own demons. We get all the myths about Los Angeles that we love to repeat over and over in film and literature, mass produced to make sure that those who've never been here get some sort of lumbering, over-the-top image of the City of Angels. Or at least that's the theory my "L.A., City of Crime" professor adopts.
In fact, "Sunset Boulevard's" metadrama is part of what makes the movie great. It's an industry that can laugh at itself, as Swanson, herself a graduate of early Hollywood, proved when she garnered an Oscar nomination for her portrayal of the maladjusted Norma. Needless to say, her transition to talkies was a little smoother. Paramount, which released the film, doesn't mind playing the corporate, hit-hungry studio and Cecil B. De Mille himself has a cameo.
It's a dark and sweeping look at historical, hyperbolized Hollywood, necessary viewing for anyone who calls themselves a student of noir. And proof that the pictures did not exactly get small.
"Waiting for Guffman"
Directed by Christopher Guest
Starring Christopher Guest and Parker Posey
Blaine, Missouri, is the hilarious location for this small scale pseudo-documentary. It's the footstool capital of the world and home to a cast of lovably insane characters, among them local drama hero Corky St. Clair, famed for his stage production of "Backdraft" (the fire department had issues).
Now he's rallying the townspeople and their inner starlets to create "Red, White and Blaine," a musical chronicling the town's colorful and folksy history. Who knew, for example, that the aliens made a pit stop in Blaine before crashing in Roswell? The stars of the production include Libby Mae Brown (Posey), a local Dairy Queen employee and Ron Albertson, a travel agent who declares, "If there's an empty space, just say a line. That's what I like to do. Even from another show."
Frighteningly, Ron and his wife Sheila are the most seasoned performers of the bunch. Yet, they're all seeing stars when Corky tells them that a Broadway scout is coming to see the show.
Besides the inherent fun of bad community theater (including some spastic choreography and an entire song devoted the manufacture of stools), the film comments sincerely and subtly on our culture's fascination with Hollywood and Broadway. All of Corky's protègès are fabulous successes in the eyes of Blaine they are big, happy, over-acting fish in a small pond. When they decide to pursue show business careers, they are painfully out of their element.
That's the message. But watch the movie for its sleeper-hit style and amusing subtext (Corky's mysterious wife and Ron's mysterious surgery--he claims to have had a penis reduction, but Sheila tells a different story...) Is Blaine ready for Broadway? Maybe not. But "Waiting for Guffman" is certainly worthy of your living room.
"Heathers"
Directed by Michael Lehmann
Starring Winona Ryder and Christian Slater
An '80s classic and black comedy must for anyone who's ever fantasized about blowing up the Heathers of their high school. The girls with the perfect hair, the new black Jetta on their 16th birthday, who made the cheer squad without ever having to endure a year of drill team, who Emil Lunden liked in eighth grade when you were such an obvious choice ... Oh wait, that wasn't the movie. Not that anyone's bitter.
Ryder is Veronica Sawyer, the reluctant newcomer in a clique that rules the lunch room. She endures their petty hierarchy and endless games of croquet until sexy rebel with a cause Jason Dean (Christian Slater) enters the scene. You've gotta love a guy who pulls a gun on the frat-boys-to-be in the middle of the cafeteria. The two team up to "accidentally" create a wave of "suicides" among the high school's elite. Soon, Veronica laments, "my teen angst has a body count."
"Heather's" is full of classic one-liners, including such gems as, "Fuck me gently with a chain saw" and "Why are you such a megabitch?" (to which Shannon Doherty, the original megabitch, replies sweetly, "Because I can be").
Of course, as the popular kids commit suicide, suicide becomes popular the "Woodstock for the '80s," according to J.D. It confirms what we all suspected that it's not what you do, but how cool you look doing it. Veronica of course learns all the right lessons about what popularity and even a few sticks of dynamite can't buy, but we like her better armed and angst-ridden.
"Heathers" is the ultimate alternative to "Sixteen Candles" and other John Hughes high-school epics. In the big croquet game of life, Winona Ryder can kick Molly Ringwald's ass any day.
"The Sword in the Stone"
Directed by Wolfgang Reitherman
OK, Disney cartoons can get kind of hokey. Anyone that can get through the last half hour of "The Lion King" without feeling sick to their stomach is quite the superhuman in my book. However, one of my favorite feature-length Disney cartoons has got to be the very-unhokey "The Sword and the Stone." It's more of an adventure-oriented movie, chronicling the "education" of young Arthur under the tutelage of the witty wizard, Merlin.
What makes this movie so great is the ways Merlin teaches Arthur his lessons. For instance, Arthur's first lesson is problem solving and quick thinking. So Merlin transforms the both of them into fish, where they encounter all sorts of evil fish in the moat of a castle. When its time for telling Arthur about love, Merlin waves his wand and poof Arthur is a fidgety squirrel, who must learn how to deal with the aggressive female who wants to mate with Arthur the squirrel.
This movie is pretty funny, too. Well, it's not as funny as "Aladdin," but hey, this is 1963, and humor took a back seat to the story. And the animation in "The Sword and the Stone" is not spectacular, a la "The Hunchback of Notre Dame," but it certainly doesn't take away from the highly entertaining hi-jinks of the would-be King Arthur and Merlin.
"Less Than Zero"
Directed by Marek Kanlevska
Starring Andrew McCarthy and Jai Geertz
Remember this one? This was one of the first anti-Brat Pack movies to be released, offering reprieve to all those moviegoers nauseated with Molly Ringwald and John Hughes. "Less Than Zero" is a loud and bright movie with lots of sex, drugs and rock-n-roll. It gives the MTV treatment to Bret Easton Ellis' tour-de-force novel about rich little West Hollywood college kids who party way too much.
McCarthy and the really sexy Geertz play a couple reviving their relationship while home from school. In the meantime, they must take care of their coke-snorting, party-all-the-time friend, Julian (played wonderfully by Robert Downey, Jr.). What ensues is life on the edge, and emotional tumult as a result of kids who think they're indestructible. After seeing Julian going through withdrawal, you've become so enthralled that you become concerned with the characters. "Less Than Zero" is heavy, and that's just what makes this sit-up-and-take-notice flick so great.
"Rainman"
Directed by Barry Levinson
Starring Dustin Hoffman and Tom Cruise
"Rainman" has to be one of the all-time greatest dramas ever. I can remember first watching it and just feeling completely floored by the emotion and performances featured in the movie. Tom Cruise has his typical reformed cocky-hotshot role but goes beyond that stereotype once a bond is formed with his autistic brother, flawlessly and touchingly played by Dustin Hoffman. "Rainman" has everything: a sense of adventure, a feel-good plot, plenty of humor and enthralling dialogue. But the life-affirming journey Cruise and Hoffman take across the country, which climaxes with a stop in Las Vegas, never once bores or wanes on the emotion factor. Beating all the other mentally-ill themed pictures by several miles, "Rainman" is definitely, definitely one of the most captivating movies of all time.
"The Professional"
Directed by Luc Besson
Starring Jean Reno and Natalie Portman
Seldom does a movie have this kind of effect on me. After watching it my brother and I jumped off the couch, pressed our faces against the TV screen and wondered in desperation who is that fabulous child actress.
Natalie Portman. I thought to myself, "I can't wait 'til she gets older. She's going to be a fabulous actress," while my brother thought, "I can't wait 'til she gets older. She's going to be real hot looking." Portman, who has since moved on to other films ("Heat" and "Beautiful Girls") is set to be in the new "Star Wars" films.
In the film's quite original story, she is a young girl who develops a touching friendship with an assassin (Jean Reno) after her entire family is murdered. Though the premise makes the movie potentially cheesy or unrealistic, the film is neither thanks to the leads. Portman is natural and her performance is heart-wrenchingly realistic. Reno is equally stellar.
The film is really a testament to how far good acting and a good story can go. And for those of you who just want to see a film with good suspense and action, yeah this movie's got that too.
"Gone with the Wind"
Directed by David O. Selznick
Starring Vivien Leigh and Clark Gable
Frankly some of you hip college students couldn't give a damn about classics. But they're not called classics for nothing.And if your parents are bugging for some quality time over holiday break, pop in this video, grab some kleenex and, ulterior motives aside, actually enjoy a great movie.
"Gone with the Wind," which spawned one of the largest talent searches of all time and started me on a very expensive and unhealthy obsession with the film, gave America Vivien Leigh, who is my non-living idol and who sometimes I tell people I was in a past life (see the extent of the obsession?) Anyway,with her piercing eyes and arched eyebrow, Leigh gives an amazing performance, easily deserving of her Academy Award. She gives depth and complexity to the southern belle and shows that Scarlett O'Hara was not just a bitch.
The performances by other actors are not too shabby either. They couldn't have really gone wrong with the likes of Clark Gable and Olivia de Havilland.
And to top it all off, the movie is just beautiful. Made in 1939 with the then brand-new technicolor, it shows movie-making back in the good 'ol studio days. Some of the scenes like when the camera pans up as Scarlett is walking among the rows of dead and injured soldiers are breathtaking.
Just see it, godammit.
"Evil Dead 2"
Directed by Sam Raimi
Starring Bruce Campbell
Okay, why the hell would anyone want to watch a film called "Evil Dead 2?" Sounds like a really bad horror flick. Well, it is. But it's one of those it's-so-bad-it's-good kind of films. Or more like it's-so-bad-it's-hilarious.
The second film in Sam Raimi's trilogy, the third being "Army of Darkness," "Evil Dead 2's" plot is not particularly ground-breaking. It's just Bruce Campbell ("Brisco County Jr.") running away from some invisible demon that's part of an ancient curse. In the meantime, you get a decapitated dancing girlfriend and some hick visitors who get possessed.
But the genius comes from two aspects of the film, the first being how low-budget it is. Audiences can revel in its pulled-back shots of bridges and trees that are just screaming "hey I'm really a small model figure." Also whenever the audience gets the demon running through the forest point of view, they get the full effect of the way it was actually shot with two camera guys running around, each holding onto one end of a four-by-four onto which a camera is ducktaped.
The truly wonderful aspect of the film however is Bruce Campbell himself. He somehow makes bad one-liners incredibly funny, (but not funny "ha-ha," funny "that's stupid"). His comedic genius shines when one of Campbell's hands is infected by an evil spirit and an entire battle with his hand ensues ending in Campbell performing his own amputation with a chainsaw.
If all of this sounds like an incredibly bad movie, as I said, it is. But that's why you should rent it.
"Little Women" the first half
Directed by Gillian Armstrong
Starring Winona Ryder, Christian Bale and Susan Sarandon
Most girls have read this classic Louisa May Alcott novel, but I haven't. Found it a little boring for my taste, preferring to stick to the more substantial Sweet Valley High books. But this sumptuously beautiful and exquisitely acted film is anything but boring and I heartily recommend the first hour of this great adaptation.
Set during the Civil War in the North, the March family is thriving despite the fact that their beloved father is off fighting in the war. Nurtured by a loving and sensible mother (Susan Sarandon), the four girls each have their own distinct personalities: The oldest, Meg, is the most traditional, who doesn't mind conforming to society's rules and finding a good husband. The rebel Jo (Ryder) is the most colorful and unconventional sister who longs for adventure and a life outside of what society decrees for her. Poor Beth (Claire Danes) is the least interesting sister, whose only role in the film is to get sick and cough a lot. And then there's the bitch Amy, who unfortunately shares my name and is so jealous and selfish and petty that every time her snotty face appears on the screen, I have to be physically restrained from attacking the television. In one fabulous scene, when Jo attacks Amy for burning her manuscript, I was secretly hoping she would kill the little she-devil.
While the film spans several years, the most enjoyable part for me is the friendship-romance between Jo and her neighbor Laurie (Christian Bale). They are so perfect for each other that when Jo refuses Laurie's romantic marriage proposal, you want to scream with Laurie and wonder why the hell not?
The film goes downhill from there, with Beth getting even sicker, Jo falling in love with some old geezer and bitch Amy trying to get her claws in the lovelorn Laurie.
As far as I'm concerned, the movie ended right before Jo says no to Laurie. I'd like to think that Jo would have given the right answer, said yes, and they would have lived happily ever after. But of course, movies must always follow the endings of books if they're ever going to be good or else they must face the wrath of critics and fans of the novels. Whatever.
"A Summer Place"
Directed by Delmer Daves
Starring Richard Egan, Sandra Dee and Troy Donahue
For the most melodramatic and hysterical soap-opera type of movie, "A Summer Place" is the perfect film that shamelessly indulges in every cheesy stereotype ever to exist in the history of romance films.
My friends and I discovered this gem on AMC one bored afternoon and were hooked on the insipid plot, pretty-boy actors and shockingly frank dialogue about sex. And this was made in the '50s!
Sandra Dee and Troy Donahue star as teenage lovers who want to be bad and give in to their uncontained lust for each other, but they can't! Trapped in Puritanical '50s society, it seems like the whole world is against them and their desire to get it on:
Dee's mother is a bitchy shrew who thinks she's the Virgin Mary and treats her daughter like a horny slut, insisting that she wear clothes that look like potato sacks in order to keep those scary men away. Donahue's father is a drunk who doesn't mind sucking up all the family money on booze instead of paying for his son's college tuition. But wait! That's not even the worst part.
Dee's father and Donahue's mother, who once were teenage lovers themselves, have left their respective spouses to marry each other. So now, poor Sandra Dee and her little Johnny are now step-siblings! While vacationing with their new parents, under the pretense of going to see the movie "King Kong," the couple go to the beach and find a shack in the middle of nowhere that seems like the perfect spot to give in to their sin. But will they? Well, I'm not going to tell you. That's why we're recommending that you rent these movies and see them for yourselves.
While the story isn't that great, the enjoyment of the movie lies in the characters' overacting, the music's climactic swells and classic lines like, "Oh Johnny, let's be bad, I wanna be bad!"
"Ordinary People"
Directed by Robert Redford
Starring Donald Sutherland, Timothy Hutton and Mary Tyler Moore
If you're in the mood to cry your eyes out and curse your insensitive parents, this is the movie for you! Forget about seeing some empty action thriller or unfulfilling brainless comedy, we all know that when you watch a movie, you really want to break down in tears, right?
Starring a very hot-looking Timothy Hutton in his breakout performance, the movie features an emotionally shell-shocked family that is recovering from one domestic tragedy after another.
First, the family's oldest, most beloved son dies in a tragic boating accident. Then the younger grief-stricken son Conrad (Hutton) tries to commit suicide and leave this world as well.
The film picks up when Conrad has just come back from the mental hospital and after reacquainting himself with his parents, it's not hard to understand why he tried to off himself. While his father (Sutherland) is a caring and loving man, his mother (Moore in the bitchiest performance ever) is a cold, heartless ice maiden whose idea of showing affection to her son is buying him some shirts and leaving them on his bed when he's not home. And every time Conrad tries to talk to his mother, she rushes off to get on the phone to plan another tupperware party.
While there are many notable performances in the film, the only character you'll ever be concerned about is Hutton. He is so convincing as the haunted, angsty, guilt-ridden Conrad that you'll want to reach out and try to hug him or at least jump his bones.
With his broken-down puppy-dog face, you'll be cheering every time it lights up in that very rare smile. I think I've counted his grins in the film and there are probably about five. But don't worry about missing them. You'll be so glad that he's happy for at least one second in his miserable life that it will make you unbelievably relieved and secretly appreciate the fact that you're on vacation and just watching this movie instead of living it.
"Enchanted April"
Directed by Mike Newell
Starring Josie Lawrence, Miranda Richardson, Polly Walker and Joan Plowright
Okay, this one's just a really nice movie. It revolves around four English women at the turn of the century, getting away from their husbands and the rainy London streets. In the warm sunshine of the Italian Riviera's cliffs, they find both empowerment and friendship, along with love from unexpected sources.
This film will leave you giddy and smiley, with definite plans for taking tea in the parlor. Play it when it's really stormy outside, pull the covers up tight, and let yourself float away to the romantic recesses of your mind. As an avid believer in escapism, I guarantee you won't even be aware of your parents harassing you for the next few days as the big holiday festivities draw near.
"Birdy"
Directed by Alan Parker
Starring Nicholas Cage and Matthew Modine.
This emotional tale, told in flashbacks, traces the events that lead up to Matthew Modine's character's mental breakdown during the Vietnam War. However, rather than focus on the traumas of battle, the film concentrates on the eccentric childhood of the snapped soldier and his relationship with his best friend, played by Nicholas Cage. Complete with tons of shattering emotional scenes and hilarious coming-of-age moments, the touching piece brings viewers into the unusual mind of a sensitive youth. Also, with a moving soundtrack by Peter Gabriel and incredibly artistic, well-shot scenes, the film transcends the realm of your standard awkward growing-up story. In essence, it left me in a state of elated dark gloom for days after I saw it, and to this day, I yearn to find, somewhere on this bleak planet, both the lead characters strange, witty and self-absorbed as they may be.
"Short Cuts"
Directed by Alan Altman.
This three-hour-long epic includes about 32 well-known actors from Tim Robbins to Lili Tomlin. It involves various intermingling short plotlines that will leave you bawling and grinning and squealing and finally, about 10 minutes after the rolling credits, broken and totally numb. Most of the tales involve somewhat disturbing subject matter, such as Jennifer Jason Leigh playing a sex-line operator who frustrates her emotionally ill-at-ease husband.
Other stories portray a chic seedy side of life, like the fading lounge lizard who rests on her former laurels, that speak to that desperate side of film reserved for late night movie surprises. "Shortcuts" excels in its originality and intelligent script, with characters sometimes saying more in what they don't mention than in what they do. And, despite its length, the extensive production will have you absorbed for its entirety. I remember driving back in silence from the theater with my mom, the both of us unable to find words to express what a profound impact the film had on us.
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