“Cradle 2 the Grave” Starring DMX, Jet Li
Directed by Andrzej Bartkowiak
“Cradle 2 the Grave” is the first good bad movie of
2003. Sure, it’s pure trash, but it doesn’t take itself
seriously, and if you go in with no expectations, you should be
entertained.
The needlessly confusing plot has something to do with Tony Fait (rap star DMX) and his crew stealing a bunch of rare black diamonds, prizes which are then promptly stolen. However, crime lord Ling (Mark Dacascos) thinks Fait still has them and kidnaps his daughter. Taiwanese special agent Su (Jet Li) also wants the diamonds and teams up with Fait to go after Ling.
None of this really matters, however, as the plot is mostly an excuse for the flashy action scenes. We get Fait trying to outrun a train, Fait and Daria (Gabrielle Union) riding atop a moving train, and Su and Ling fighting each other in a ring of fire ... while it rains!
It’s sweet that director Andrzej Bartkowiak (Romeo Must Die) tries to put symbolism in a movie of this caliber, but it’ll probably get lost for most people amid all the kicking and punching.
DMX, while not quite up to par with Ice Cube in terms of rappers turned actors, acquits himself respectably, while Jet Li does what he does best, playing an amazing fighting machine. The rest of the cast has a good time, especially comic relief providers Tom Arnold and Anthony Anderson, chewing on the scenery. UCLA alumna Union does her best with the two dimensional role of love interest/sex object, but she clearly can do better than this movie. The dialogue is awful, but let’s face it, that’s not why people are going to see it.
“Cradle 2 the Grave” will certainly please fans of Jet Li and DMX. For all others, it’s a nice, mindless snack. Just don’t go expecting a full meal.
-Johanna Davy
“Spider” Starring Ralph Fiennes, Miranda
Richardson Directed by David Cronenberg
Cronenberg can’t tell the difference between hollow
infuriation and genuine intrigue, and this confusion continues with
“Spider,” his moodiest and most frustrating effort to
date.
“Spider” features Ralph Fiennes as the title schizophrenic at a British halfway house for the mentally ill. He seeks the true nature of the events that caused his madness, flashing back to his childhood in an attempt to rebuild his memory. The audience must empathize with Spider and question the credibility of his web-like memory.
While playing Spider probably required an incredible amount of skill on Fiennes part, the mumbling and scribbling look foolish and overdone. Richardson, however, nails the multiple roles she takes on. She manages to maintain the subtle distinctions between her motherly characters while still unifying them as the amorphous object in Spider’s mind.
Unfortunately, this tiresome exercise leaves little to be desired or reexamined; the focus of the film is crystal clear, yet its meditations on that focus are unrewarding. The painfully slow exposition and predictable conclusion prevent “Spider” from having the impact it so desperately wants. It becomes a picture about memory that is ultimately forgettable.
-Paul Mendoza